How to Address Every Envelope

Guest List Examples

Use these examples when filling in your guest list. Names shown here are fictional.

Married Couples

• Mr. and Mrs. Everett Haverling
  Traditional Formal
• Mr. Everett and Mrs. Lenora Haverling
  Modern Formal with both names
• Mr. Dashiell Vance and Ms. Marisol Quintrell
  Wife kept maiden name. Either name may come first.

Etiquette guidelines based on Emily Post's Etiquette, The Centennial Edition and emilypost.com.

Professional Titles

The person with the higher rank is always listed first.

• Dr. Lenora and Mr. Everett Haverling
  Wife holds PhD or MD, husband does not. Her name first because her title outranks his.
• Dr. and Mrs. Everett Haverling
  Husband holds doctorate, wife does not.
• The Drs. Haverling — or — Drs. Lenora and Everett Haverling
  Both hold doctorates, same last name.
• Dr. Marisol Quintrell and Dr. Dashiell Vance
  Both hold doctorates, different last names.

Etiquette guidelines based on Emily Post's Etiquette, The Centennial Edition and emilypost.com.

Clergy and Military Titles

Per Emily Post, spell out military ranks and use the full clergy form on envelopes.

• The Reverend Corwin Ashbury
  Protestant minister — "Reverend Ashbury" alone is not correct.
• The Reverends Margot and Corwin Ashbury
  Both are Protestant ministers sharing a surname. The wife's name is listed first.
• Captain Daniel and Mrs. Amanda Price
  Active-duty officer and spouse, same last name.
• Lieutenant Colonel John Doe, US Army
  Retired or formal use: branch of service on its own line.
• The Honorable Jane Carter and Mr. Robert Carter
  Elected or appointed official with a spouse.

For written salutations inside the letter, use “Dear Mr. Haverling” or “Dear Dr. Haverling” — not “Dear Reverend.” Military titles are always spelled out on the envelope, never abbreviated.

Etiquette guidelines based on Emily Post's Etiquette, The Centennial Edition and emilypost.com.

Unmarried and Same-Sex Couples

• Mr. Dashiell Vance and Ms. Marisol Quintrell
  Unmarried couple, same address. Connected by "and." Either name may come first.
• Ms. Delphine Marchetti and Ms. Thea Okonwe
  Same-sex couple, both women. Either order is acceptable.
• Mr. Ellis Sundberg and Mr. Rafe Whitaker
  Same-sex couple, both men. Either order is acceptable.

Etiquette guidelines based on Emily Post's Etiquette, The Centennial Edition and emilypost.com.

Single Guests and Plus-Ones

• Ms. Thea Okonwe
  Single woman, formal
• Mr. Everett Haverling
  Single man, formal
• Mr. Dashiell Vance and Ms. Thea Okonwe
  Guest with named plus-one. Using the name is warmer than "and Guest."
• Mr. Dashiell Vance and Guest
  Only when plus-one's name is genuinely unknown at time of mailing.

Etiquette guidelines based on Emily Post's Etiquette, The Centennial Edition and emilypost.com.

Families and Children

• The Haverling Family
  Entire family invited, casual
• Mr. and Mrs. Everett Haverling & Family
  Formal with & Family
• Mr. and Mrs. Everett Haverling / Wren, Sable, and Linden
  Named children on second line. Children 18 and over receive their own invitation.
• Mr. and Mrs. Everett Haverling
  Children not invited. Address parents only. Do not hint. Clarify on the RSVP card or wedding website.

Etiquette guidelines based on Emily Post's Etiquette, The Centennial Edition and emilypost.com.

Children on Envelopes

Children's first names appear on the line just beneath their parents — on the outer envelope, or on the inner envelope when one is used.

• Wren
  One child
• Wren and Sable
  Two children — joined by "and," no comma
• Caleb, Naomi, and Ruth
  Three or more children — commas between, Oxford comma before the final “and”
• Wren, Sable, Linden, and Cove
  The same rule scales for larger families.

Etiquette guidelines based on Emily Post's Etiquette, The Centennial Edition and emilypost.com.

Adult Children

Traditionally, adult children — eighteen and older, whether they live at home or on their own — receive their own invitation addressed to them by name. It is a small gesture that says, plainly, you are an honored guest in your own right.

That said, many modern families make different choices depending on the occasion and the household. Consider this etiquette guidance rather than a strict rule, and do what feels right for your family.

Etiquette guidelines based on Emily Post's Etiquette, The Centennial Edition and emilypost.com.

Always Spell It Out

The one exception: honorifics may always be abbreviated — Mr., Mrs., Ms., Dr. are all correct. Everything else in the address should be written in full for formal correspondence.

Etiquette guidelines based on Emily Post's Etiquette, The Centennial Edition and emilypost.com.

Return Address Options

Three placements, each with its own quiet meaning. Choose the one that fits the occasion.

• Front (Upper Left)
  The most common and least formal placement. The recipient sees the sender immediately — practical, friendly, and well suited to everyday correspondence.
• Back Flap
  The traditional placement for weddings and milestone celebrations. Keeps the front of the envelope clean so the recipient's name takes center stage.
• Handwritten
  Some hosts prefer to pen the return address by hand for a personal touch. We leave it off the printed PDF so you can add it yourself.

Etiquette guidelines based on Emily Post's Etiquette, The Centennial Edition and emilypost.com.